BETHANKSGIVING
I'VE LANDED IN THE GREAT STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA
Everything is rocking. This has only ever happened to me a few times before – when getting off of an ummmm boat. I just departed from the best international flight I've ever had and boy do I feel as though it had to have been cruising across the Atlantic NOT on a flight. Everything is swaying for me. (And this time I can’t blame it on that yummy international Delta beer. Because it was early morning when I took off in France and then mid morning when I landed in the great US of A. The only bubbles I was drinking came in the form San Pellegrino.) C’est la vie!
I slept exactly zero hours the night before I was to fly to the Land of the Free – too excited to snooze and too swarmed with thoughts about leaving France. Wondering if I will want to return after filling up with some good ole family L O V E. The day before I took off, I wandered the city solo. Roaming about feeling thankful for the hours before, where I had been invited to celebrate a Friendsgiving at my new friends, Shae and Antoine’s, home with Leah, Ariel, Emily and her new sweet beau, Lash, and so many others.
I too walked around thanking Paris. She was sending me off with bright memories of her shine! The sun was out beaming in full force and therefore, so was I!
I stayed outside soaking it up all the livelong day. Saying farewell to her and a few of her gems, and my favorite spots, until I return in a month: Place des Vosges, our lady, Notre Dame, and the Seine. I had been packed for days, so I had nothing to do, but enjoy this time and to wait for the upcoming day of travel.
Before tucking in fully, I had help toting my heavy $%& checked bag down the five flights of stairs to lock her overnight to James Chocolatine. I thought this would be the kindest thing to do for A. me and my back (having help) and B. to the building. (I mean a 4:30am wake up call of grunts and bag-bangs down each step isn’t an ideal way to wish my neighbors a happy holiday season while on my way out.
It worked like a dream!
ALL ABOARD!
Just before the gate was closed for my 8hr and 55min (yes, this is how long the pilot said it would take. Not 8 1/2 hrs. Not 9hrs. 8hr and 55min. Killed me!), and I was convincing myself that I was going to be blessed with a double seat all to myself, Danny, a happy 25 year old, first generation American, bounced down the aisle and took residence beside moi. This would be his third flight of four from Egypt to Nashville – some 30+ hours already spent on his journey, he was the best (sleeping) seat-mate.
Before he let his eyes fall to the back of his head for a long winter's nap kind of airplane snooze, he said ‘please wake me up if you have to go to the bathroom.’ (He was on the aisle.) I followed with ‘well, you please don’t wake me when the stewardess comes with meals. Just order double of whatever sounds good to you. I won’t eat anything so pretend you can pretend it’s for me and then have mine.’ He loved that. So we were going to get on just fine! We both ended up snoozing through lunch and to my surprise we both said yes to the “dinner” — and by dinner, I mean, hot-pockets. I had brought my usual, large size Tupperware of salad, and since it was 6pm France time, and I had only eaten biscoff cookies (practically THE ONLY reason I fly Delta. Yummy.), I decided it was time to eat some greens. People looked at me like I had three heads. And by the way I was rocking, maybe I did!
My second flight was just as enjoyable. I had done as all of my fellow passengers had done and followed signs for the 5:13pm flight to the Grand Strand to Gate F6. But when the clock struck 4:30pm we all started to panic as the plane wasn’t there, the flight agents weren’t there – nothing was happening. Two of us in the crowd received Delta texts that “they are excited to welcome us to gate B13.” Hummmmmmm WHAT?! That gate is most certainly not what the signs say. Atlanta is the largest airport in the continental United States. So, this would not just be a hop, skip and a jump away – this would be a bolt, pant, and dramatic tram ride away. We had no choice! I made an announcement to the other passengers and like a herd of animals we all migrated at a swift and focused speed to our new gate. When we got there the man checking tickets hurried me along. As I walked through the door I understood why. I was the last one. With one swift motion, I heard the door slam behind me!
I felt famous walking to my seat as everyone yelled a thank you to me for saving them. Can you even imagine if we had missed that flight?! I would have missed sushi date night with pops! Ha. No I would have missed that of course, but most importantly. I would have missed Bethanksgiving!!
No. I made it! I was homeward bound, officially. And all without one person asking me about my visa status, or the timing of my return, I might add. I never showed any of the official French documents that I had printed before leaving. I never got stopped for full body scans or random checkpoints before the international flight. Nothing! Greenlights all the way across the border pour moi! Yay!!
Descending into Myrtle I had a wave of excitement to see my Pops. He was coming to pick me up and had given me instructions as to how to let him know I was ready for him to pull around and load me up. It went something to the tune of “Whistle once if you’re not here and twice if you are here.” This was a joke – he used to have Miller and me sit at the top of the stairs when we were little girls on Christmas morning. One whistle meant Santa didn’t come. Two whistles meant Santa did come. He would habitually wait a good 20 seconds or more in between whistles to fake us out, and then, he would inevitably let the 2nd whistle ring out loud and lonnnnnnng.
Naturally, I did the same. I sent him a whistle emoji right when I deplaned and then waited (mine was a little longer than 20 seconds) until my bags were in hand before I sent the second whistle. Within minutes I saw him pulling up. After hugging and tucking all my bags in the car (hoping to go back with gifts, so I packed extra lite, but lots of suitcases), he tossed me the keys and told me I would be driving to the restaurant. Uh oh. Did he forget? This transatlantic girl was pushing 30ish hours of sleep deprivation and unexplained boat sway sensations. Buckle up!
I took off! We headed to sushi where I proceeded to order practically one of everything on the menu before my Pops pointed out that I was falling asleep. We drove home and by 3am France time, 9pm US time, I was finally crawling into bed and making up for my lack of shuteye.
CROSSROADS AND WATERWORKS
Tuesday morning was full, with a capital F U L L, of emotion. I’m sure it had everything to do with leaving Paris with weird feelings, returning to Myrtle with familiar feelings, being with family, feeling unsettled, being jetlagged, hungry, excited, happy, tired… you name it! I was feeling it. ALL. To decompress, I sat on my father’s beautiful porch absorbing the sunshine and fueling my veins with strong hot coffee. He joined me outside and nearly 2 hours later, and 37000 conversations later, we landed on the word crossroads. He told me about his experience with this word and shared that each phase in his life he has had one. He told me that the key to make it through challenges, times of confusion, times of happiness, and times of sadness is to be solid in my own values, beliefs, and faith. I confessed to him that he nailed it. That is exactly what I’m experiencing right about now. A crossroad.
As you all know, my visa is up in France, this past year has been wonderful in many many ways, AND it’s also been one of the hardest years of my life. Not having a solid answer on my visa verification, and having a chance to return home for the holidays with people who are tugging at my heartstrings to return closer to them, I’m definitely experiencing a crossroad. One that I just KNOW is going to give me a greenlight soon in one direction or the other. I am solid in faith with that at least.
After we wrapped up our deep conversation and packed me into my new car for the month (his car that he has sweetly tuned up and prepared for me to use while I’m stateside), I got lost driving to Conway — which of course brought on more tears. Waterworks this day!! I thought, has it been that long since I haven’t driven the ummm ONE straight road from Pops’s to my mama’s? I did a few u-turns, and eye wipes, and somehow managed to get back on track and arrive to a happy Rarrie and Goldie.
When I pulled, my two girls were sunbathing in the front yard waiting for their daughter and mama. C’est moi! Uh oh, bring on the kleenex again. Seeing my mama and my Goldie Hawn was medicine for my soul. And started the waterworks again! I have missed them both immensely. I wanted to be where they were, I wanted to learn from my mama as I shared all my thoughts with her, I wanted to dump on her and have her comfort me, I wanted to say yes to things she wanted to do, I wanted to cry to her, I wanted to laugh with her, I wanted to talk at length with her, I just wanted to be around my mama!!!!!! So I did. All of it! All the livelong day! [Thankfully, she has always taught me that if we don’t cry our heads would swell. It’s a precautionary measure to deflate them every now and then with a good boo hoo (that’s my story and I’m sticking to it!)]
We walked down to the Trestle restaurant for their classic BLT, on what they call sourdough but what the rest of the world would call sweetbread, and black bean soup lunch. My dream! The weather was unreal so we sat outside. En route, we made a pitstop to smooch my uncle, Spivey, at his office downtown and then as we were wrapping up our meal my mama spotted Mac, my childhood best friend. McCall’s family actually owned the Trestle forever, and forever ago. So the irony and serendipity of meeting her there was wonderful. Turns out that her youngest son is a Paris fan – he was sporting a Paris Saint Germain jersey. I felt so proud, like he was rooting for me!
Joe made us a fire that night, where we enjoyed our beers overlooking the river and ate homemade fish chowder while Goldie Hawn sniffed around our feet hoping that we would drop something, anything! We didn’t. New ‘no begging’ training is in full effect in the Louis household.
BETHANKSGIVING
This past Thanksgiving in Latta, filled my heart. Talk about food for the soul! This was it — figuratively and literally!
I could have eaten up all of my sweet second cousins, second removed (We went over the order of cousins and how we are either first cousins, second cousins, third etc? Or half or…blah blah blah?? about 100 times until my cousin, Jennifer, and one of the smartest people I know, set us straight. Her children are my second cousins. And my second cousins are second cousins second removed to my other second cousins. If you can follow! Ha). Anyway… Lucy (Bear), Ellie (Bird), Ben (B bop), and Georgia (GA) all had nicknames from their father, Steve, and made me swoon at how much love you could feel from their little unit. All individually cool, smiley, BEAUTIFUL, and interested in others. I shared with their grandmother, Joy, my stylish beautiful aunt, before I left, that getting to know them this trip was an upgrade for me! They are at the best ages and are 100% going places and doing big things in this world!
Then, there was my boodle, Lilly girl. She had been telling her mama and daddy, two of my favorites, Elizabeth and Rob, for weeks that she was “most excited to see her Aunt (note, this is not Anne) Caroline.” Swoon!! Each meal I was summoned to sit beside her, I was invited to play telephone games with her, and I was to serve as her “base” in every tag game she recruited my other cousins to play. (I knew this only after feeling her little body hurl (I’m talkin full speed ahead) into my legs and wrap her hands around my waist while laugh-screaming “BASE” as she took safety.) Ultimate boodle! As I type, I am waiting to receive a drawing that she made for me from the United Post Service. Can’t wait for the delivery.
Eli and Emily introduced us to their bundle of joy, Felix. THE most precious rosy red cheeked lamb of all time. I was asked not to kiss his face which nearly killed me. (Alas, they probably had done their researched and read too many of my En Routes where I talk at length about making-out with my boodles. So, rightfully so, they were trying to prevent Felix from all the open mouth kisses he would have 100% received from his second cousin if they had said yes to me). Instead, I smooched his little baby feet and admired the way my first cousin, and first time papa, Eli, adored his son. Melt!
I could go on and on and on about each and every one of precious family members. I’m in love! They are all incredible. Tilden, the supermodel! Aiden, the full blown grownup football player! My cousin Jason and his wife Tracy, Lindsay (better known as Bird to her mama, and my partner in crime when together), my uncles and aunts, Hank, Barbara, Jenny, Chris, Joy, Howard, Connie, and of course my 97 year old grandmama, Joyce. In total, not to forget my favorite family unit of all – mine! – B, b, M, bm and Pops, we capped out at 31 people! It was the best one yet!
That house will forever be a memory of cousin slumbers made of forts and living room pallets, a puddin’ pop dispensary in the summertime, a tree climbing jungle gym and pecan factory in the fall, and now the bonfire campsite at Bethanksgiving.
After our meal of smoked turkey (thanks to Pops and Boggs who put it on at 5AM!!!!), dressing, brown rice, homemade cranberry sauce, sweet potato casserole, Brussels sprouts, rolls, and 1000 other things, Grandmama held court in the formal dining room. We all sat around as she opened every drawer and cabinet in her Silver hutch. We all made over her gorgeous collectables as every granddaughter was given a beautiful sterling mini bowl. It was so special. We also walked around the house and collected the things we wanted to live on in our homes. It was giving Grandmama such an upgrade to see that we wanted her beautiful things. I took that opportunity to go try on a beautiful coat that I had always admired. It fit me like a glove and the consensus in the family (the eruption of applause when I modeled it was a dead give away that they approved) was that I was the only one who would actually wear it and give it a rebirth.
[Both of my grandmothers were (one still is) chic beyond belief. Always fixed. Always matching. Always buttoned up. Always ready for company. So, I got that bug naturally!]
She ended up saying that she too couldn’t imagine anyone else loving it as much as I would and that I needed to take her coat home. Ah! How special. Avec plaisir. I did, and have already given it the best welcome back to life, as I have not taken it off barely at all!
The night before Thanksgiving, I spooned Belle Miller at my spend the night party with Miller and BM. Since Boggs and Boggs jr were camping with Pops and Uncle Chris, I got Belle Miller all to myself!! Heaven. When I took her for breakfast in the hotel the next morning, my little stick-thin niece housed a bowl of cereal, two pancakes with mounds of syrup, and to wash it down? 74,000 packets of French Vanilla creamer with a splash of decaf coffee. I could eat her (but from what she ate, I’d get a tooth ache ;)). What a boodle!
En route to the house for the big meal, we passed freshly harvested cotton fields. Ah!! The beauty of the South!! Miller, the Martha Stewart of our family — who I later referred to as The General given all of the demands… oooooop, I mean, directions she was commanding. Oooooop, I mean, offering us to do — told me to pull over if I saw any uncut stalks. I made a u-turn when I saw the perfect bundle and headed straight for the field where Miller and Belle Miller hopped out and twisted the branches until they uprooted to become part of our gorgeous centerpieces.
‘Friends, family, good health and times like these’ were the undercurrent of everyone’s Thanksgiving Thankful sentiments when we went around the room. I felt all of these immensely this year too.
Thanksgiving holiday makes me proud to be an American, the sweet potato casserole, followed by two different flavors of pound cake makes me proud to be a southerner, and the mounds of brown rice (better known to some as ‘stick o’ butter rice’ since it has so much of that yummy goodness!), makes me proud to be a Bethea! At this lunch — I was proud to be it ALL.
A few nights ago we ate our last Thanksgiving meal of 2024. A leftover Thanksgiving dinner with Joe and his ladies: moi, my mama, Diane, and Martha. It was wonderful!
IT’S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS
Arriving back in Conway the following morning, mama and I took GH for a very long stroll down to the Riverwalk. We wanted to see the Christmas tree to spark that Christmas cheer for a day of decorating! And it worked! We have dressed every corner of her gorgeous home!
And, my two little sister-cousins, Emmy and Helen, came over for an afternoon beer with us. Upgrade for me! They both arrived around 4pm and good lawd did I want to eat them up. I didn’t say a word (rarity I know!) the entire time they were here. They just shared what’s going on for them. And I was there for it! They taught me the term “trauma dump,” they taught me about reading people’s palms, and they indulged me in every detail of their current lives – where they are living, who they are dating, why they aren’t dating the other people, where they are traveling, what has them excited / upset / nervous / motivated etc., and Helen taught me all about her Eight Ball strategy. It went something like this: “I consult my Eight Ball about everything. For example, I ask if I should drink a beer. If it shows ‘no.’ I don't’ drink the beer.” We roared with laughter. She then went on to say “and if someone doesn't like that I do that. I’m so sorry for them! Bye!” She’s her own woman and I love it!
The homemade meals, early morning coffees with family, evening outside beers, the pretty consistent background Christmas music and/or films, and the gabbing about all the ornaments that we hung — ah! It’s been a wonderful thing to be home so far (waterworks and all on the first few days) for the holidays this year! So happy!
And for those who have been curious, Yes. Goldie has been following me around and letting me snuggle her on the couch. She’s enjoying her very long walks with me by her side, and I have been enjoying all the sunshine and time with HER. In fact I just had a long wonderful cemetery walk with her and Rarrie after an incredible lunch with my father downtown.
I am Charleston bound very soon, where I will be upgraded with SO MANY friend visits, a new haircut, a cavity free dental visit (fingers crossed), a lengthy visit with my favorite guru of all times, Vanessa, and boodle smooches with a brand new little Luna girl who doesn’t even realize how much I already love her!! I am over the moon to get there and have another great week full of L O V E.
Until then. Xxo from South Carolina