BODY HAIR & CHARM
A WEEK OF YSL, READING AND SWEETS (IN FOOD AND NEWS FORM)
BODY HAIR & CHARM
Yes! These were the answers that Mr. Yves Mathieu Saint Laurent gave when asked the following questions in a private interview back in the 1960s:
“What is the best trait of a man?” – body hair
“What is the best trait of a woman?” – charm
I mean!!
I loved that men, in his eyes, as a designer, needed a blanket of hair draping their limbs, back and belly to be deemed the best (and funny enough the one Frenchman who I’ve loved has this to a T – body hair for days, aka, YSL’s perfect man). And us precious women? All we needed, in his eyes, was to be charming. Nothing had to adorn our bodies to catch his attention (no large or small breasts, no particular color of hair, no height requirement) – we just needed to have elegance and class. I could not have loved this answer more! Made me want to crank up my Jackie O-ness.
DAY AT THE MUSEUM — WITH HOPEFUL NEWS BOOKENDING THE MORNING AND EVENING
I started out my week with Mr. YSL and his floral fashions at Les Fleurs d'Yves Saint Laurent exhibit. He is my designer crush. Everything he designed was double-take worthy. I mean how much time do you have? The tuxedo smoking jacket?!! What are we even doing here? It’s everything! The infamous transparent black blouse that sent sexy waves of shock through the fashion and editorial world that women’s breasts … if you can even believe it… were seen as classy vs crude in sheer fabrics? The chic and whimsical floral gowns in the 80’s with hats that wouldn’t quit? The firm and tight structure on some fitted silhouettes and the elegant flouncy-ness on others? EVERYTHING he dreamed up and then brought to life looked like a million bucks.
I stayed for an hour, soaking it all in. This precious little museum (favorite of mine à Paris) has only about five small rooms, but that was my plan for the day, so I took my time in drinking it up. One room, which I had never entered until now with this exhibit, was filled with shelves of YSL’s inspiration books — either from the actual archives or replicas of what he was believed to have owned. It instantly took me back to when I was a young pup working for Reed Krakoff: the mega dreamer, designer, and the person who I feel so honored to call my first NYC boss. He would order books upon books every week and stack them all over his corner office on 34th Street, with the Hudson River as the ultimate breathtaking backdrop. It was a dream! It was also back before we had iPhones — Otherwise, I would’ve snapped a picture to keep as inspiration for what I hope my future den will look like one day: dripping in gorgeous coffee table books – stacked under, beside, and on all the empty spaces.
I also thought of Reed’s office when I saw YSL’s design boards in that room. It reminded me of the Coach building, where color boards and books littered the offices, the hallways, the kitchens, and the interns' closets – again, all the empty spaces. I even studied the desk that was there to look like YSL’s. It too looked almost identical to Reed’s. I remember one day, while Reed was on the phone with one of his many creative and famous friends — Isaac Mizrahi, Iris Apfel (who I met on my first day working for him — electric moment!), or Donna Karan — he casually sketched a daisy. Just a simple sketch. One flower on a scrap of white paper. That daisy became the emblem of his East Hampton house, or rather, château — it was stamped on the stationery, embroidered on all the towels, and etched in the guest’s gifts. A daisy sketch. Another little synchronicity I picked up on during my time in this museum room: designers and their love affair with the simplicity of florals. J'adore ça!
I hadn’t slept a wink the night before. I had something on my mind – one of those hurt feelings kind of things that requires your undivided rinse and repeat kind of attention to the fake conversation in your head when night falls and there is NO time to sleep for fear of missing a good comeback in this not real scenario – where the person who has hurt your feelings (innocently, unbeknownst to them) isn’t combative at all. Yet, rather calm as you let them have it in your most polite sock it to ‘em tone. Yes. Ridiculous! And up all night for NOTHING! Why are situations so much bigger in the dark of night?
So, now that the birds were chirping and the trash trucks were too (they both start singing at 5am ish) I felt it ok to snuggle down for a moment of reprieve just before I jumped up and headed to SoHo House to take a mini steam (heaven! So I said an out loud prayer to soften my heart with this situation) and sauna (hell! So I sweated out my upset). I then walked the city. I’m talkin the WHOLE city until I reached my destination: Musée Yves Saint Laurent.
En route, I made a quick pit stop for a matcha chocolat blanc from Café Kitsuné (my absolute favorite sweet treat). I tell myself it get it "for the caffeine," but let’s be honest — it’s basically a warm milkshake, so it’s just for the sweetness. Alas, when I put it in a to-go coffee cup, somehow, that little move magically turns my kid-like beverage into a legitimate grown-up morning (disguised coffee) brew. My fellow sidewalkers are none the wiser that they’re sharing the walkway with an … adult child! Anyway – hyped from my sugar rush, I found myself outside of Librairie Galignani where I practiced the phrase “c'est vide” (it’s empty) to convince them that I could walk into the shop with my “coffee” (warm milkshake) cup.
The store takes my breath away everytime. When I lived in NYC, McNally Jackson did the same thing for me – hell, I had to start paying for a membership there to discount my hardbacks due to the amount of books I was buying in that shop! I could have done the same thing in this one too. It’s SO charming! (So naturally, YSL would have loved that a woman was in there buying her books. C’est moi!) I went to buy The Let Them Theory, my new obsession, written by Mel Robbins – who’s my new Oprah. (NO! I didn’t mean that!! No one can replace Oprah, but Mel is a close second.) They had two in the shop – lucky me! It was released only a few days ago. When the book rang up at 33€ (my lucky number), I felt it was a greenlight / sign not to confront this friend of mine who didn’t mean to hurt me. It was a God Wink to be patient. So I was.
Even being at the museum made me relax and forget about what had consumed my mind hours before. Creative thinking will do that! J’adore! After I had had my visual fill, I took myself to Noura Marceau for a tummy fill at this always delicious, always bustling Lebanese restaurant. Here, I cracked open my new book and there laid all the signs I needed to release my sadness about that up-all-night situation. I had been told this very thing earlier that morning by a very wise person and here it was again in black and white ink: Let Them be them (speak / act as they will) and Let Me be me (realize I have zero control over another’s words or actions and therefore can chose to respond / not respond in a way that serves MOI). It felt liberating! And obvious! But sometimes helpful to have a reminder. Because it’s so different from the concept of “let it go” – I don’t know about you? But when I’m told to let something go my internal womanly charm cranks all the way down as my internal lioness rises to full volume! I detest that statement to let it go. How do y'all let things go? I feel like that’s defeat. Like it’s not real. That people can just what? Pretend their foot wasn’t stomped all over and just go on as if nothing has ever happened that caused the pain in the first place? No way! In that case (stealing a line from the funniest person I know) “I’m ready to fight!” – not let it go.
But, this book?!! To “let them” do what they’re going to do and let me do what I’m going to do?? Huge upgrade! Shift of the way I will think about these kind of situations in the future. It was a page turner for me and one that already has dried out one highlighter and my favorite gel pen with all the underlining and notes.
After I scarfed down my meal, I finished talking with my waiter in French (he is learning the language too!) and asked for my bill. Are you ready? It came out to 33€. I texted my mom immediately. She turned me onto Mel Robbins, or maybe I did her. I can’t remember at this point – I just know that we both are obsessed with this woman and spend more time than not quoting her when we get on our hours-long weekly conversations. She couldn’t get over it! That I had too (like her) bought the book that day and had already seen two sets of 33s (which of course she knows are my God Wink numbers). Greenlight!
I walked over to Carette after to get another hot milkshake – in the form of a hot chocolate this time. WHAT? Some days you’re just hungrier than others, just like some days you have a tooth that is sweeter and screaming for attention! Today, I could NOT stop drinking hot kid drinks in to-go cups disguised as adult coffees. And loved every minute of their piping hot sugary goodness!
I walked all the way home (9 miles in total this day) while I voice-texted Emily about coming to view my apartment. SO much happened on this day. Are. You. Ready?! (I’m blaming it on the 33s, the book, and the wise words at the beginning of my day): I received a text back from my sublet-landlord, Simona, that the owner of my treehouse on Île Saint Louis in fact didn’t want to come back to Paris to take over the apartment, after all. But rather, she had decided that she would like to rent it long-term again. Hummm, what?! Greenlight for my girlfriend who is considering a move herself. And ahhhhh greenlight for me??! YEP. JUST as I was voice texting Emily with this great news – I kid you NOT – I got an email from the French Government (about time!! Hallelujah!) that they are reviewing my request.
Last week, or maybe it was the week before, I received the email from them to please be patient. And now this!? That they are reviewing my case? I mean TAILWIND. Two emails in a row? I feel it is only a matter of time before I get either an extension (for them to take longer to decide – which, be my guest, as long as they give me that formal documentation) or approval (ultimate goal) of another year long visa. So, I then realized OH MY GAWD!! If I do get approval to stay, I would obviously like to keep this place I’m already in and make this my home for a while. I would be the one to sign a long term lease!
I know, I know, I know! It’s like one minute I think I need to move back to the US of A and then the other I’m shocking you all with this excitement (and relief) to have the ability to stay put for another year while I calmly (without force or rush to) figure it out. I will agree, I sound all over the place with my decisions lately – but I can assure you, you would feel the same too if you had every option in the world presented to you and the pressure of a timeline to choose where to go and what to do.
As my mom tearfully expressed to me while we were a good 90 mins into one of our weekly 2 hr+ long calls on Monday, she wants nothing more than to have me there with her in Conway (she even made a joke about how she wishes I lived at her house with her and Joe. So sweet! And so genuine.) But, she went on to say that she knows that what is best for me and my heart at this moment is to stay still. Not to return. Definitely not move to Conway (I love my hometown, but that’s not the move). Stay here à Paris. Build a home from scratch and really give it a shot. In that precious moment of sincere support and respect from her that she trusts me to figure it out – even if it means that an ocean will continue to separate us – felt like freedom. Like true love. I was so grateful for her selflessness and acceptance. What a gift!
Lately, with all of my options and US sentiments that make me miss home – friends offering me their second bedrooms for me to ‘call home’ if I were to move to NYC, a best friend expressing how thrilled she’d be if I were only a train ride away on the East Coast, a mama and daddy who would pretend not to be so concerned for me if I were on US soil again, and the ability to find a place to live with GH – gawd I miss my 9 year old puppy! (yes, she had a birthday on the 1st of February) and on top of all of this, the options are here in Paris as well. I have a precious pied à terre where I have felt safe and settled the most since I arrived in this new city and country of mine back in October 2023 – and now have the option of actually staying if I wanted! Renting directly from the owner (which I 100% want), the ability to buy my own furniture and make it a home of MINE (which I want). And to continue to work remote (which I want)! The options feel incredible to have, and also have brought on a paralysis of decision making, as you can imagine they would.
Therefore, to hear my mother, who I know wants me home the most for no other reason other than pure love and the desire to put her arms around me way more often – told me that SHE is the one who thinks it’s best for me to stay. I felt 100,000lbs lifted off of me. I know I am my own person, I can make my own decisions, but there is nothing like feeling you’re letting your parents down – or that you’re doing something that neither of them want you to do / support, even though you know it is the better decision for you. So with that kind of permission / conversation on Monday, and then all of this greenlight news happening on Tuesday. Ummm yep! To go back to what my astrologist said back in my first En Route of the year – I indeed, believe I am having a lucky streak with a tailwind kind of year! It’s already proving to be so!
In considering moving back – the underlying desire was to have a place to be mine forever. Alas, the way my mom explained it to me – I will have a home no matter where I go and no matter how long I’m there. She, since I’ve known her, has had three houses – and they have all been HOME. She reminded me that I created a home in NYC (in my four different apartments and that summer out East in Springs), I created a home in Charleston (in three different apartments), and now, I will create a home à Paris. The only caveat. This time, I have to build it from scratch! Tailwind!! Because as luck would have it, Paris has the greatest flea markets of all time. Ones that all the designers who I have worked for, like Reed, get on a plane for, cross the Atlantic Ocean for, just to come BUY their inspiration to take back to the USA. How lucky am I? I have that ability to do that by just hoping on the metro.
So, as of now, whenever you think of me, PLEASE think of me happy and calm and holding my visa in hand. Everything feels like it is close to being back in flow. It’s only a matter of time that my visa finds its way to me too.
PAGE TURNER
I knew I had a special fondness for Oprah Winfrey when I started watching her daily show as a little girl. She came on at 4pm and back when I worked after school for an accountant named Bill Hardee (who, sidebar: chain smoked cigarettes in his windowless office all the livelong day), always made sure the show was ready for me to enjoy while I ‘filed’ his client’s taxes. Oprah impressed me then and still does today with her genuine curiosity and respect for all walks of life and the stories they have inside of them. Over time, I’ve even found myself associating her with someone like Jesus in the way she sees the world and her acts of kindness. It’s the kind of generosity that feels so real that it MUST be connected to a deeper source – and an unmatched wisdom. (Can you tell? I love her! In fact, I have actually always felt like if we passed each other on the street SHE would recognize ME due to my admiration.)
And this week? I’ve grown even more fond of Oprah and her love of books. She recently interviewed Alanis Morissette on her podcast — another one of my lady crushes — and they both shared that their ideal week is one where they have zero plans and are just cozied up on their couches solo with their books. What??!! C’est moi!!! Honestly, that’s been me this entire week. I mean, my couch isn’t cozy – ummmmmm at all. Hence me wanting to replace that pronto – but spending a week with my books? That is spot-on one of my favorite things to do. I finished a lent paperback early this week and have now not been able to put down The Let Them Theory. I too recently bought George Saunders’ Lincoln in the Bardo which I can’t wait to devour after all my highlighters are dried out from marking up the pages of Let Them. I love love love a good silent reading kind of hibernation week. And cherry on top? Oprah herself praises the Let Them book!
With next week being my start of another contract with Indagare, and last week being the busiest of my life – I had a plan for practically every hour I was awake. You couldn’t pull me away this week to do anything (unless you asked me to meet you at one of these epic restaurants – which of course I obliged with pleasure: Brigitte, Cosi, Recoin, or have a glass of wine at L'Etiquette on Île Saint Louis, have a palmier at Le Boulanger de la Tour, or a chocolat chaud at Comptoirs Les Deux Magots.) So, in Oprah language this book has had too many Ah Ha moments to count and too many that I hated to miss by being off of my un-cozy couch away from my pages.
Tomorrow I will be celebrating my birthday early at Fanny and Patrick’s new wine bar, La Bonbonnette with many of my friends in Paris – Over the moon! I plan to sport either my velvet RRL smoking jacket (that now I feel for sure was inspired by YSL) or a silk bodysuit that I wore when I rang in my 27th birthday à NYC. Can’t wait to doll up and be amongst new and old friends. This time, I promise to document!
I too will be hosting one of my best friends, Caroline, for the full weekend – to gab, laugh, and visit together. We’ll meet up with Miranda and bébé Margaux (who is officially two years old. She shares a birthday with my Goldie Hawn, on February 1st).
And now, I am signing off today with a very grateful heart. I love feeling connected via En Route with all of you – I love the texts that you all send me once you’ve read them and all the calls I get because of keeping my favorite people up to date with my voyage Français. My hope is that I will continue to have the opportunity to write these from over here as my time is extended!
Until I know for sure .. or write the next lengthy En Route. Xx ac
