BEARS and LADYBUGS
FINAL WEEK OF LIMBO
Sunday morning I woke up and decided to do a 3hr meditation. I know, I know!!! It was a big one. One that I sat up for for a while, one that I laid down for for a while, then sat up again, then laid down again etc. So, naturally, I was going in and out of a dreamlike state – who am I kidding – I was actually dreaming at times! When I got done, I felt so good, but also felt like I may have just taken an extra long nap. So, to make sure I had connected with the unified field, I asked the universe to show me… bears.
(When I do this, making sure that what I experienced was real and therefore asking for proof, I always pick something that would be tough to deliver. Random words that I need to hear, random sounds, or images, or animals etc. And seeing bears? In Paris? That was going to be a challenge for sure. But, I thought, if I had connected – I was sure to see them.)
By the time afternoon came around, and I had walked the hood, visited the Panthéon, and nestled down in Jardin du Luxembourg for an afternoon of reading, I had forgotten that I had even asked to see the bears. (That’s the key actually — to forget it — that’s when it comes. The key for everything else in life too, eh? Ask for it. Then get busy forgetting it. Then it will come.)
So, instead, I thought. I want to see my ladybug. I got so excited because I just knew I’d see her. And after I had read so much of my book and been photographed by an NYC journalist (RANDOM AS HECK SIDEBAR: he came up to me, spoke in French, asked me not to move because he’d like to shoot the way I’m sitting with my clogs. I said yes as long as he didn’t capture my face in the photo. It was the most random “modeling” request I have gotten in … well, days. Because this MAJOR RANDOM AS HECK SIDEBAR happened a few days after: My friend texted this week to ask if I would “run around town with her over Fashion Week so she could shoot a major brand’s bag on me.” EEEEp! How fun! I wrote her back instantly… “Lemme think about — 100%!” This time I didn’t ask for my face not to be captured. Instead she made it clear “we will not be shooting your face. Just the bag with a denim on denim look.” haha ok loud and clear!).
Ok, so back at it… I was leaving Jardin du Luxembourg when I thought “ok, this is the last few mins before I will be inside for the duration of the night, and the probability of seeing a ladybug is slim to none inside, so … now’s your chance, Universe. Show her to me!!!!” - Mais, non.
So, I too forgot that I had asked about this and carried on with my night when I returned to the apartment.
Fast forward. I queued up Martin Scorsese and Fran Lebowitz’s Pretend It’s a City on Netflix (best thing since sliced bread, if you ask me) while I was showering, cooking, etc. Laughing with them – but not really looking at them while it was on. Until, the computer went quiet. When I looked over to ensure it hadn’t stopped … would you guess it. The ONLY thing dancing on the screen? Bear, after bear, after bear. Randomly!!!! I giggled because that mean I had indeed connected!!! That was my proof.
The bears were flinging salmon on the shore, they were running about… they were everywhere! My body was electric! So weird and unexpected. Mais, non. The silence, that called my attention to look at the screen, was Fran taking a minute to pause before sharing the funniest moment about writing a camping article in the 90s – with – BEARS.
Doesn’t end there though. As I had also asked to see my ladybug.
So, as I was turning the light off that night. I looked up to the ceiling, where a colony of summer insect creatures were gathering, and lo and behold – the one walking across the ceiling to reach the party was none other than my ladybug! I could NOT get over the synchronicity. But then again, if you know me well, and most of you do, you know that this happens often to me. Almost always I see what I have asked the universe to show me – in the sake of connecting. (And many times, when I don’t get the sign that I’ve asked for, that too (not getting it) has been a major sign in itself… Of needing to do, think, go the opposite direction etc.) If you don’t believe me. The next time you see me, ask me about one of the following situations: my mom saying the word banana in NYC, ladybugs at the Biltmore Estate, a dandelion in London, a butterfly on my shoulder in Paris, a lightning bolt in Jackson Hole, my niece saying mermaid in Greenville, Clair saying jellyfish in Italy, not seeing a ladybug that I asked for – but seeing a clear sign that same day that it was time to shift gears, etc. The list goes on, and on, and on!)
So far… each time it happens. My body feels electric, as if it’s the first time!
HEAVEN IN THE 6EME to TREEHOUSE ON THE ÎLE
This past week I took residence in my slice of Heaven in the 6th. And funny enough (although, not funny at all, because it wasn’t meant to be), as much as I had wished this place would have been my home – I am honestly, over the moon that it worked out as it did. (As it always does. When you trust that it will, eh?!)
Cyrine has the best apartment in the building in my opinion. 1. No one is above this one so you don’t hear footsteps (upgrade) 2. There are windows throughout – even in the bathroom – that leads me to 3. Privacy. It is the tallest building facing the street, so I have been above all the other across-the-street apartments. No one can see into mine. Therefore, even when I shower, I have the windows wide open – to the breezeway that NO ONE has access to, but moi. 4. It has a view that won’t quit. Every night I got to the window to wish both of the domes, at the Panthéon and Sorbonne University, fais de beaux rêves as I closed my curtains.
It has been a dream! Albeit, a dream with some funky tasting water and a backed up shower, but a dream nonetheless.
Ok. I don’t know whether it’s because I had just returned from a trip with the girls who have no option but to buy water in Mexico to drink, make coffee with, wash vegetables in, etc… but when I arrived here, very thirsty from bringing all of my things, I went to down some H2O and ummmm almost spit it out. It tasted like chemicals, or pipe, or je ne sais pas, but gross. So, I did what I NEVER like to do because it adds to the mass of plastic waste that is n'importe quoi. I bought ample 1 liter water bottles of Evian to outfit the kitchen cabinets. Another greenlight that I didn’t take this place after all – because I think just one week of this kind of waste was enough for me.
Let me just say — even with this water fiasco, I am so thankful that I have had the pleasure of staying here for a week.
But, when I received my keys for my new apartment on Île Saint Louis from Simona and Inalya, her beyond precious daughter (who was channeling the Spice Girls hard with her top knot, denim rhinestone shoes, flared pants, 3 clips in her hair, and hot pink spaghetti strapped shirt), on Wednesday – It felt SO right. I felt I was at MY home.
The morning I got my keys, I finished up my first work project (they gave me a week to have it completed, and ummmm I had it finished in one day. I am SO HAPPY to be working again. And I simply love the team!). I then met Justine at her apartment to take all of my things from her place (my Saint!) to my new place. Ah! My things, MY THINGS (insert Peaches & Herb singing “reunited and it feels so good” riiiiiiight here).
It wasn’t many bags – and yet it was many lbs. I thought my back was breaking at one point on the (what should have been) 4 minute walk over. So we stopped many times to let me rest before continuing. Two blocks away and it took us a solid 12 mins each trip we made. Snails pace and elephant loads.
When we arrived – I had vowed that Justine would NOT help me take ANY of the heavy loads up the many flights of stairs. Mais, she was the SWEETEST… and wouldn’t listen to me. She, along with my (other) saint of a landlady, Simona, all pitched in. One by one all of my dozen bags made it to the tippy top, where my little treehouse awaited.
Simona and I celebrated by me giving her one of my very awkward-WAY-too-long-of-a, hugs. And Justine and I? We celebrated with several demi-pintes of beer at my watering hole there, La Brasserie de l'Isle Saint-Louis. We decided then and there that we would dine somewhere new on the island each month together. (And, since there's only about six restaurants in total on ÎSL, I figured we will have covered them all by the time my sublet is up). We’re still percolating on the name for our new club.
CHRISTMAS DAY or ACTUAL MOVE DAY
Thursday morning I woke up to a text from Simona at 7:30 a.m. “We are on the train. It’s all yours!” I couldn’t have leapt out of the bed any quicker. Felt like Christmas day!
At any given moment that day you could have found me with a vacuum in hand (in the apartment or on the street. That’s right! I walked this high powered lightweight vacuum from my week rental all the way to my new treehouse for cleaning. C'était parfait!), a pair of pink latex gloves on, and a pen and paper in hand jotting down all I will need to complete this house into a home.
First order of business – rearrange the bedroom.
[SIDEBAR: I told Nico and Miranda on Saturday night — when they were back from their trip and I was treating us all to beers and boodle smooches — that when I get into a new place… even if I love how it’s set up… I like to rearrange the furniture. I just think it’s necessary for new feng shui. They thought it was bazar until they reached London to visit her parents a few days later and sent me a video of Margaux doing the same thing! Like aunty like boodle, eh?!]
The bed had me stumped though. Especially trying to move it solo. It was going to be a very tight fit – and yet, I KNEW where there was a will, there was a way to make it fit where I wanted it to go. So, as I shuffled the heavy bed around and had it turned all but this urrrrg ¼ of an inch due to a wall it was bumping up against. I decided to crank up the determination volume and just get it done.
So, as a young woman did when her father was under a ton lb car – and needed to rescue him – she picked up the car by pure determination alone. She didn’t sit around thinking about all the nutella she may have eaten the night before and possibly the bread that went along with it (licked fingers raised high for this scenario) and think … ‘hummmm… with all that sugar carbohydrates… I wonder how this is gonna go.’ No, she picked up the car and saved her dad. So, granted, this was NOT life and death over here. But, I, like that woman, did what I had to do. I picked up that heavy ass mattress, then I picked up the bed frame, then I moved the bed into the position I wanted.
Volià.
I also moved around a chest and table, and took down shelves etc. I cleaned out every nook and cranny in the place. After… I may need physical therapy to rid my back of the muscle spasms – but it was worth it. I have fallen madly in love with my new space because everything is where I want it to be!
(sneak peek below. not at all finished. stand by for more next week…)
[ANOTHER SIDEBAR: In March, back when I was feeling low (not in flow), my friend Margot invited me over to her and her husband’s beautiful apartment. I wrote about it in this En Route… that it felt like a home instantly. Family pictures, artwork, vintage wine glasses that had been collected by the two of them. You name it, I turned my waterworks on for it. I cried so much that day with her. And she, kindly, said “You’re homesick, AC.” It was true. I missed feeling like I was home. I missed having my things with me. I missed having the liberty to create a beautiful space out of barebones. I missed THIS FEELING of being comfortable in my four walls. And now, just like that. On wednesday, I got it! A place to call home.]
OUTINGS
This week, being in a new hood, and wanting to soak it up, I have only been doing things on Rive Gauche. I have visited Jardin du Luxembourg everyday, I have run up to the 14th, I have met Leah and Laura at Judy Market, I have had drinks with Emily at Bar du Marché, I have met up with Cara for drinks and dinner in the Odeon, and just last night, I had plans to see Selden but instead – since her father in law happily surprised her and Thomas with a visit – I got to see Vivian for a charcuterie dinner at Café Odeon.
WRAP UP
I am so thrilled that at the end of this week, all of these keys will be exchanged for just ONE. Mine.
I will have all of my beautiful things under one roof. Mine. and I will have a best friend in town to help me seek out the best rugs, lamps, and elongated collapsible table from the Saint Ouen Market – Vivian. She forfeited her flight back to the US two days ago for a Labor Day weekend in Paris. I couldn’t be happier that she’s here. I am meeting her in a little bit at her rented flat in Place des Vosges. C'est parfait!
So today, I am writing, packing up for my FINAL move of these two months in limbo, having a gratitude and wishing happiness weekly call with my new team and company, and I am enjoying this rain. As I made mention in my last En Route, rain makes EVERY transition of leaving one place for another – easier. Today is proof! Leaving my Heaven in the 6th for my Treehouse on the Île... dodging raindrops.
xxo ac
ps: Miranda and Nico’s 2022 wedding was written up in The New York Times. This was hanging in their apartment and it wasn’t until the day I left, last Saturday, that I noticed it. How wild is it .. that out of 100s of guests… Caroline and I made the Cover! J’adore!
